An acquaintance and I were talking earlier this afternoon. I'd mentioned something I'd written that may have been partially relevant to his interests. While I knew he wasn't going to like every aspect of it - there was one kink in particular that I knew he would be disinterested in - I went ahead and shared anyway.
His immediate response? "Ew XD"
...
This is a very good example of the kind of reaction I fear I'll get any time I share something that isn't perfectly acceptable in every way by every person that might come across it. It has a lot to do with why I tend not to do nearly as much writing as I used to and, in part, why I seem to be far more active on Twitter than almost anywhere else: It's rather difficult to be controversial in 140 characters or less. Considering that the sort of things I like most are the sort of things I also basically don't have an audience for, why should I bother?
After his first post he did say it was decently written and detailed - though he refused to say anything more specific about details he liked - but never once did he apologize for his initial "lighthearted" reaction even after I said I found it highly offensive and insensitive. Instead, he went off on a rant and said he thought I expected him to be his "submissive little *****" (censorship his, but no points for guessing the meaning) when I simply expected a bit of common decency from someone who also has a kink that would absolutely disgust most people.
This is especially troubling given that the person in question has been pushing me hard to be more open with him, to trust him, and all manner of other things that he - frankly - hasn't earned. I'm not sure I can even respect him any more, let alone some of the other things he said he wanted and implied he expected. After I said that his reaction makes it extremely unlikely that I'll be sharing much of anything with him in the future, he took offense to that without acknowledging I just might have had a valid reason to be upset in the first place.
All I expect from people with regard to such things is a little bit of respect. There's a massive difference between going "ew" and saying "I'm not really into that, but thanks anyway." This holds doubly true for people who explicitly ask me to share more things with them, though that has been an incredibly rare occurrence for me in recent years and has led me to just be quiet about my personal stuff most of the time.
I honestly have no idea what to do about this particular incident, but I'm still extremely upset about it several hours later. I'm no longer physically shaking, as I was at the time, but I'm literally losing sleep over it. If this weren't still bugging me I'd probably have been in bed sleeping soundly an hour or two ago. Instead I'm writing this out to try get it off my mind. I doubt the offending individual will ever read this; part of me hopes he doesn't. I also have no intention of publicly naming and shaming him; my conscience wouldn't allow it. So I'm just posting this here and ... well, whatever happens, happens.
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